This Page

has been moved to new address

Coddle, Cuddle, Whip or Nestle

Sorry for inconvenience...

Redirection provided by Blogger to WordPress Migration Service
body { background:#123; margin:0; padding:20px 10px; text-align:center; font:x-small/1.5em "Trebuchet MS",Verdana,Arial,Sans-serif; color:#ccc; font-size/* */:/**/small; font-size: /**/small; } /* Page Structure ----------------------------------------------- */ /* The images which help create rounded corners depend on the following widths and measurements. If you want to change these measurements, the images will also need to change. */ @media all { #content { width:740px; margin:0 auto; text-align:left; } #main { width:485px; float:left; background:#eec url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_main_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; margin:15px 0 0; padding:0 0 10px; color:#333; font-size:97%; line-height:1.5em; } #main2 { float:left; width:100%; background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_main_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:10px 0 0; } #sidebar { width:240px; float:right; margin:15px 0 0; font-size:97%; line-height:1.5em; } } @media handheld { #content { width:90%; } #main { width:100%; float:none; background:#eec; } #main2 { float:none; width:100%; background:none; } #sidebar { width:100%; float:none; } } /* Links ----------------------------------------------- */ a:link { color:#9db; } a:visited { color:#798; } a:hover { color:#fff; } a img { border-width:0; } #main a:link { color:#347; } #main a:visited { color:#666; } #main a:hover { color:#68a } /* Blog Header ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { #header { background:#357 url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_cap_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; margin:0 0 0; padding:0 0 8px; color:#fff; } #header div { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_cap_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:8px 15px 0; } } @media handheld { #header { background:#357; } #header div { background:none; } } #blog-title { margin:0; padding:10px 30px 5px; font-size:200%; line-height:1.2em; } #blog-title a { text-decoration:none; color:#fff; } #description { margin:0; padding:5px 30px 10px; font-size:94%; line-height:1.5em; color:#abc; } /* Posts ----------------------------------------------- */ .date-header { margin:0 28px 0 43px; font-size:85%; line-height:2em; text-transform:uppercase; letter-spacing:.2em; color:#586; } .post { margin:.3em 0 25px; padding:0 13px; border:1px dotted #bb9; border-width:1px 0; } .post-title { margin:0; font-size:135%; line-height:1.5em; background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/icon_arrow.gif") no-repeat 10px .5em; display:block; border:1px dotted #bb9; border-width:0 1px 1px; padding:2px 14px 2px 29px; color:#333; } #main a.title-link, .post-title strong { text-decoration:none; display:block; } #main a.title-link:hover { background-color:#fff; color:#000; } .post-body { border:1px dotted #bb9; border-width:0 1px 1px; border-bottom-color:#eec; padding:10px 14px 1px 29px; } html>body .post-body { border-bottom-width:0; } .post p { margin:0 0 .75em; } p.post-footer { background:#fff; margin:0; padding:2px 14px 2px 29px; border:1px dotted #bb9; border-bottom:1px solid #eee; font-size:100%; line-height:1.5em; color:#666; text-align:right; } html>body p.post-footer { border-bottom-color:transparent; } p.post-footer em { display:block; float:left; text-align:left; font-style:normal; } a.comment-link { /* IE5.0/Win doesn't apply padding to inline elements, so we hide these two declarations from it */ background/* */:/**/url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/icon_comment.gif") no-repeat 0 45%; padding-left:14px; } html>body a.comment-link { /* Respecified, for IE5/Mac's benefit */ background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/icon_comment.gif") no-repeat 0 45%; padding-left:14px; } .post img { margin:0 0 5px 0; padding:4px; border:1px solid #586; } blockquote { margin:.75em 0; border:1px dotted #596; border-width:1px 0; padding:5px 15px; } .post blockquote p { margin:.5em 0; } /* Comments ----------------------------------------------- */ #comments { margin:-25px 13px 0; border:1px dotted #6a7; border-width:0 1px 1px; padding:20px 0 15px 0; } #comments h4 { margin:0 0 10px; padding:0 14px 2px 29px; border-bottom:1px dotted #6a7; font-size:120%; line-height:1.4em; color:#333; } #comments-block { margin:0 15px 0 9px; } .comment-data { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/icon_comment.gif") no-repeat 2px .3em; margin:.5em 0; padding:0 0 0 20px; color:#666; } .comment-poster { font-weight:bold; } .comment-body { margin:0 0 1.25em; padding:0 0 0 20px; } .comment-body p { margin:0 0 .5em; } .comment-timestamp { margin:0 0 .5em; padding:0 0 .75em 20px; color:#fff; } .comment-timestamp a:link { color:#fff; } .deleted-comment { font-style:italic; color:gray; } /* Profile ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { #profile-container { background:#586 url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_prof_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; margin:0 0 15px; padding:0 0 10px; color:#fff; } #profile-container h2 { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_prof_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:10px 15px .2em; margin:0; border-width:0; font-size:115%; line-height:1.5em; color:#fff; } } @media handheld { #profile-container { background:#586; } #profile-container h2 { background:none; } } .profile-datablock { margin:0 15px .5em; border-top:1px dotted #7a8; padding-top:8px; } .profile-img {display:inline;} .profile-img img { float:left; margin:0 10px 5px 0; border:4px solid #bec; } .profile-data strong { display:block; } #profile-container p { margin:0 15px .5em; } #profile-container .profile-textblock { clear:left; } #profile-container a { color:#fff; } .profile-link a { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/icon_profile.gif") no-repeat 0 .1em; padding-left:15px; font-weight:bold; } ul.profile-datablock { list-style-type:none; } /* Sidebar Boxes ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { .box { background:#234 url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_side_top.gif") no-repeat left top; margin:0 0 15px; padding:10px 0 0; color:#abc; } .box2 { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_side_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; padding:0 13px 8px; } } @media handheld { .box { background:#234; } .box2 { background:none; } } .sidebar-title { margin:0; padding:0 0 .2em; border-bottom:1px dotted #456; font-size:115%; line-height:1.5em; color:#abc; } .box ul { margin:.5em 0 1.25em; padding:0 0px; list-style:none; } .box ul li { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/icon_arrow_sm.gif") no-repeat 2px .25em; margin:0; padding:0 0 3px 16px; margin-bottom:3px; border-bottom:1px dotted #345; line-height:1.4em; } .box p { margin:0 0 .6em; } /* Footer ----------------------------------------------- */ #footer { clear:both; margin:0; padding:15px 0 0; } @media all { #footer div { background:#357 url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_cap_top.gif") no-repeat left top; padding:8px 0 0; color:#fff; } #footer div div { background:url("http://www.blogblog.com/rounders3/corners_cap_bot.gif") no-repeat left bottom; padding:0 15px 8px; } } @media handheld { #footer div { background:#357; } #footer div div { background:none; } } #footer hr {display:none;} #footer p {margin:0;} #footer a {color:#fff;} /* Feeds ----------------------------------------------- */ #blogfeeds { } #postfeeds { padding:0 15px 0; }

October 02, 2008

Coddle, Cuddle, Whip or Nestle

I surprised even myself. When Thing 2 hit Thing 1, we all braced ourselves for "trouble". I must admit, I am quick to snap my voice. Bark in controlled frustration. I'm not pleased or proud that I do this. It's a bad habit I am - quite honestly - trying to break.

Normally, consequences for hitting would be; me scolding someone, then a time-out either standing facing the corner or being sent to their room (depending on how serious the hit is -- and how tired I am). This time, however, almost organically, the consequences were different.

I calmly moved index finger, silently actioning Thing 2 come to me. I took Thing 2 by the hand and walked upstairs. Instead of turning at the bedroom, we sat in a chair. "You can sit here with me. No, you can't touch the keyboard. Just sit. When you are ready. Go back to Thing 1. Apologize. Hitting isn't nice. Just sit for now." To both our surprises, Thing 2 nestled (great word - "nestled") into my shoulder and sat quietly on my lap. Thing 2 took a deep cleansing breath. Nestled.

Neither coddle the child nor give them the whip. I strongly believe that a time out is beneficial for a child to change emotion and behaviour. Cuddle time is not coddle time. It's time to connect. Time to relax, de-stress, breath. Thing 2 was surprised by my silent consequences. I was surprised how well it worked and how quickly both our emotionally snapping stopped. I surmise that; we all just need to nestle in silence sometimes.

Labels: ,

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Comments are a good thing...

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home