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March 15, 2010

Explaining Death to Kids

My grandmother has died - as she lived - very gently and with great dignity.

My focus has shifted from March Break activities to explaining death to my kids (total 180 in my brain activity). I put it out to twitter - if anyone had any #kidlit advice on the subject.

@MMPerspectives recommended "When Dinosaurs Die: A Guide to Understanding Death" by Laurie Krasny Brown. It has very friendly illustrations. The writing is very approachable and respectful. It covers many different traditions of funerals (religious and non-religious) and it addresses feelings and fears. The only note I would make is that it opens death a bit wider than I was looking for (accidental death, child death, suicide*) - but surprisingly - my kids connected with some of it (I had a fetal demise in the summer and upon reading the page on when youngsters die - my youngest connected that picture to "our baby"). (*the suicide part is a picture of pills with a short sentence - you could easily skip that illustration box if you prefered).

I found "Wishes for One More Day" by Melanie Joy Pastor at the libary. Though it didn't connect with our religious tradition, the positive approach was good. It focused on good memories and putting those memories to paper as a keepsake. The living memories.

@earnestgirl recommended "The Tenth Good Thing about Barney" by Judith Viorst. (Which I have not read but shall be putting on my hold list at the library). Though the description tells of a boy who's pet has died...it seems to follow the unsure times and positive memories surrounding a loss.

I did find one other book at the libary - illustrated in deep browns and yellows (which instantly made me think of that CSI episode where Nick is burried alive in a box). It could have been a text masterpiece but the eery illustrations was a deal breaker in taking that book home.

If you have or will be, in the situation of explaining death to kids, I would recommend these books. Let me know if you have others - I'll add them to the post.

Labels: explaining death, Parent Club, Parenting

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